Testimonial: 6 Mistyping as 4
Below is a post from the Facebook group written by Talia Marcheggiani:
PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT
People asked why I'm not upset about being typed a Sp/So 6. Here is the short answer:
First of all, I am upset. I'm always upset. I cried all night about how I was a scared and lonely child desperate to be liked who wrote in her diary about sandwich-only diets. This realization is far from new, though. It was previously chalked up to being a 4. In fact, my 4-like emotional sensitivity, depth, need to be seen, aesthetic sensitivity, and sense of alienation and shame fooled not only myself, but Enneagram experts and close friends for years. This was mostly because none of us fully understood the colourful emotional complexity of 6. And also because I didn't want to acknowledge that I was common.
However, when the video evidence became clear, I accepted my 6 typing because I believe I'm self-aware enough to know that I hate myself, which is why I joke about it (and thus overcome it). I see everything I do is based in fear, and a desperate need to level with people and be seen as agreeable and loveable. I'm also the same type as George Carlin, which makes far more sense than being the same type as Nicole Kidman: delicate, refined and beautiful. Instead I'm noisy and self-deprecating and carry around Dollarama bags wearing vintage sweaters with holes. I'm Tina Fey.
Identifying as a 4 was complicated. I had to twist my psyche around to see hints of elitism and superiority. When relationships didn't go well for type-unrelated attachment issues, I would contort the facts to align them with motivations based in 4 typology: "focussing on what's missing" or needing fruitlessly to have an innate brokenness "corrected" through love. In hindsight, it is much easier to directly palpate the actual anxiety that drove the existential crises I sunk into when relationships were falling apart.
Perhaps those who refuse to identify with 6 after being typed by experts (and run crying from the group, or stay to constantly question their type, which is just more evidence of 6) despite clear signals, captured on video, that point to their true nature, are just deeply fixated in 6 and therefore prefer to be the more exotic types like 4, 5, and 8 in order to slip out from under the actual sensations of fear that drive them.
It is not fun to be a 4, 5 or 8. Being any type is only ego-inflating when it's not actually your type. When type descriptions are only partially accurate they impregnate us with a sense of warm belonging rather than the cold horror that can arise when reading about your actual type—seeing yourself as you truly are, a naked, flawed ape clinging tightly to a ball spinning through space. Space trash.
Everyone I know who typed accurately as the more sought after types cried when they first read about themselves. Want to be a 4? Ask Joseph how fun being a 4 is.
Now, please, either get in this dumpster where you belong, or close the lid.
Thank you for looking at me. That is all.